What To Do?

The guy code has been as important as it has been unofficial for a very long time. In case you're unsure of what the guy code is, the following is an excerpt (my unofficial interpretation):

• If you were at least aquaintences with a man before meeting his sister, she is off limits, unless you intend to marry her.
• No man is required to buy a birthday present for another man.
• Any woman who professes a love for sports does not belong until she can show genuine knowledge of the game and ability to hold her liquor. Still, she should be treated with caution if she is at least a friend of a friend of a buddy's girlfriend.
• It is never permissible to talk to a man in a bathroom unless the two of you are both urinating or both waiting in line. In any other situation, the conversation can wait.
• If a guy is running more than five minutes late, it is acceptable to leave without him.
• If a buddy is out-numbered, out-manned, or too drunk to fight, you must break it up or jump in. That is, unless he has broken the guy code in the last week.

This code has served the male population well, and I don't have any qualms with it. However, there is another unofficial list that I have some difficulty with. This governs the interaction between men and women. More precisely, it governs what men are expected to do. I don't know of any such list that gives women any responsibility beyond those shared mutually between strangers, but let me know if I'm wrong.

It seems to me that, in this age that calls for equality between the sexes, equality should be expected. This is, of course, when applicable. I've been known to force my sisters to change their flat tires while I watch, but I'm not going to watch while they move furniture or another situation in which being male provides an advantage (unless they refuse my help). It doesn't make a lot of sense to me to decry things like income disparity, glass ceilings, and gender roles in the home while expecting men to fulfill their gender roles outside of the home. Normally I don't give this much thought, but it has recently been affecting me. One of my friends has said that we should go to the bars sometime soon, but I'm pretty sure she'll expect me to be buying drinks if I go, since she has said in the past that she doesn't bring money with her. That kind of attitude irritates me, so I'll probably let her know before we go that I won't be fronting her tab.

I think that most fathers should take a more active role in raising their children. And certainly equal pay for equal work is something to work toward, at least in a corporate setting. While I have a problem with how much money and attention male athletes get, I don't have a problem with them making more money than female athletes if it's a sport in which the male athletes bring in a much bigger audience. But for most matters about gender inequality I think that if change is suggested, it should be done with respect to the expectations for both sexes.